Sharing Is Important
October 30, 2007
This was on the Daily Om a while back:
September 25, 2007
Sharing Grief
Opening To Receive Comfort
When we experience something that causes us to feel shock and sadness, we may feel the urge to withdraw from life. It may seem like remaining withdrawn will keep us protected from the world, but during these times it is important to reach out to those trusted and precious people who care about us the most. Even with our best information and reasoning, we never know when someone else’s experience or perspective can give us additional information that we need. The universe speaks to us through many channels, and when we open ourselves up to receive its messages, we also receive nurturing care from a loving partner in life’s journey.
Grief is part of the human experience, and sharing our vulnerability is what creates truly close bonds in our relationships. Opening ourselves up in this way gets to the core of our being, past all of our defenses and prejudices. When life seems to crack the outer shell of our world, we are both raw and fresh at the same time. It is then that we discover who is truly willing to walk with us through life. We also see that some of those sent to us may not be the ones we expected to see. Regardless, we learn to trust in the universe, in others, in our own strength and resilience, and in the wisdom of life itself.
Sharing grief allows us to ease our burden by letting someone else help carry it. This helps us process our own inner thoughts and feelings through the filter of a trusted and beloved someone. We may feel guilty or selfish, as if we are unloading on someone who has their own challenges. Although, if we think about it, we know we would do the same for them, and their protests would seem pointless. Remember that not sharing feelings with others denies them the opportunity to feel. We may be the messenger sent by the universe for their benefit, and it is on this mission that we have been sent. By sharing our hopes and fears, joys and pains with another person, we accept the universe’s gifts of wisdom and loving care.
And it occurs to me that I was not allowed the benefit of sharing my grief. I don't think my siblings were able to share their grief either, but of course I don't know for sure. The stigma of suicide was much greater in 1956, and I can't possibly imagine what my Mother went through. Is this denied grief the reason I am processing this after 51 years? I think so. I'm still amazed over this whole thing, that I was able to live in such complete denial for so long, that my body demanded that I begin the process, that the emotion is so very intense (like no time has passed at all). I am just astounded by this whole thing. And last, but not least, maybe the sharing thing is why I need to post this on my blog. We never know how we might impact someone else's journey, but I know the sharing thing is important.
This was on the Daily Om a while back:
September 25, 2007
Sharing Grief
Opening To Receive Comfort
When we experience something that causes us to feel shock and sadness, we may feel the urge to withdraw from life. It may seem like remaining withdrawn will keep us protected from the world, but during these times it is important to reach out to those trusted and precious people who care about us the most. Even with our best information and reasoning, we never know when someone else’s experience or perspective can give us additional information that we need. The universe speaks to us through many channels, and when we open ourselves up to receive its messages, we also receive nurturing care from a loving partner in life’s journey.
Grief is part of the human experience, and sharing our vulnerability is what creates truly close bonds in our relationships. Opening ourselves up in this way gets to the core of our being, past all of our defenses and prejudices. When life seems to crack the outer shell of our world, we are both raw and fresh at the same time. It is then that we discover who is truly willing to walk with us through life. We also see that some of those sent to us may not be the ones we expected to see. Regardless, we learn to trust in the universe, in others, in our own strength and resilience, and in the wisdom of life itself.
Sharing grief allows us to ease our burden by letting someone else help carry it. This helps us process our own inner thoughts and feelings through the filter of a trusted and beloved someone. We may feel guilty or selfish, as if we are unloading on someone who has their own challenges. Although, if we think about it, we know we would do the same for them, and their protests would seem pointless. Remember that not sharing feelings with others denies them the opportunity to feel. We may be the messenger sent by the universe for their benefit, and it is on this mission that we have been sent. By sharing our hopes and fears, joys and pains with another person, we accept the universe’s gifts of wisdom and loving care.
And it occurs to me that I was not allowed the benefit of sharing my grief. I don't think my siblings were able to share their grief either, but of course I don't know for sure. The stigma of suicide was much greater in 1956, and I can't possibly imagine what my Mother went through. Is this denied grief the reason I am processing this after 51 years? I think so. I'm still amazed over this whole thing, that I was able to live in such complete denial for so long, that my body demanded that I begin the process, that the emotion is so very intense (like no time has passed at all). I am just astounded by this whole thing. And last, but not least, maybe the sharing thing is why I need to post this on my blog. We never know how we might impact someone else's journey, but I know the sharing thing is important.
